A little stillness for Monday morning...


Yes.  I remember Adlestrop —
The name, because one afternoon
Of heat the express-train drew up there
Unwontedly.  It was late June.

The steam hissed.  Some one cleared his throat.
No one left and no one came
On the bare platform.  What I saw
Was Adlestrop — only the name

And willows, willow-herb, and grass,
And meadowsweet, and haycocks dry,
No whit less still and lonely fair
Than the high cloudlets in the sky.

And for that minute a blackbird sang
Close by, and around him, mistier,
Farther and farther, all the birds
Of Oxfordshire and Gloucestershire.

- Edward Thomas

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A Dream Within A Dream

Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow-
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;

Yet, if Hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it, therefore, the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

 - E.A. Poe.
  • Current Music
    Scarborough Fair - Simon and Garfunkel
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New flatmates...

Sarah moved in!!  She arrived with all her boxes on Saturday after being thoroughly messed around by stupid movers and their co-conspirators.  She is now happily (I think!) installed in the back bedroom with a wondeful collection of books, clothes and cosmetics... we proceeded to have a brilliant girly evening with pizza, ice-cream, La Reine Margot and plenty of gossip and giggling.  On Sunday, I went to church whilst she did some more unpacking and then we had the wonderful Steph over for tea and cake and more gossip.  Unfortunately I had to use the afternoon to iron all my clothes which had accidentally gone through the tumble dryer and as a result were creased to hell...  Then we watched some of our favourite girl Kat Von D, discussed eyeliner and went to bed.  After all, we're both working girls.

The other new addition to the household is our lovely black and white kitten Mungus (thank you son_of_darkness !) who is cute, furry, playful and everything a kitten should be.  Pics will be posted later.  And she has a pink collar.  With a sparkly pink heart.

Another great piece of new is that the king of pin-up pohotography, the wonderful Ben Westwood, has said that he will do my photoset for Suicide Girls.  Could I wish for a better photographer?  I think not.

All of this added to a a lovely, rosy evening on Friday makes me almost weep with happiness.

Kiss Me

OMG! Dan Rad's lost virginity!!!

OK, so I know that we don't believe everything (anything?) that we read in that delightful rag the Daily Mail, but I thought the Dan Rad fans amongst you might be interested (however sceptically) in this article:

Imagination on a rampage!


Hey guys

If anyone would like to see the pics of the lovely bands that I photographed last week, they're up on my myspace page:



Thank You

Just a quick post to say thank you so much to everyone who replied to my post yesterday or gave me a call to offer a listening ear, shoulder to cry on or prayers or thoughts.  I've learned in the last few months that my friends are truly amazing people who really do come through for me when the going gets a bit tough.  I love every single one of you more than you can know and appreciate your caring and your friendship a great deal.

I stayed in last night and did some meditation/prayer and that has helped me to lay the issues that were nagging at me to rest and to move on from there, having learned stuff.

On a brighter note, I'm really looking forward to our church retreat to Launde Abbey this weekend... a great chance to rest, take stock and go for walks in the beautiful grounds with some lovely people, including our brilliant curate Father David.

Thanks once again to you all... much love.

(Mr Tails, I will give you a call this evening.  It's been too long)


"God made sin so that we may know his mercy"

I hope this little aphorism is true, although I doubt it is... I really screwed up recently and I have realised something about the nature of sin.  People jokingly say that sin is fun, but as I have discovered, it's anything but.  I have also realised that morals are there not to stop you having fun, but to stop you getting hurt, f**king yourself up and to stop you hurting other people.  I have betrayed everything I believe in and hold dear for a very shallow, throwaway reason and I am thoroughly ashamed of myself.  And I have suddenly realised how precious forgiveness is, because I'm so human.  If anyone on my flist feels like praying for me at the moment, it would be very welcome because I'm having trouble making my peace... but this piece of music is helping:

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    Wagner - Liebestod
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LOLtastic evening in Camden

So, last night hedonisticatedand I decided (a little drunkenly) that it would be a really great idea to go to the Electric Ballroom last night after Coffee, Cake & Kink closed for the evening to find some lol!guys.  And we found them!  In droves!  I was in heaven on the top floor with Guns n' Roses songs blasting out and plenty of boys with long hair to keep me amused (which they did) and hedonisticatedsoon attracted the attentions of a handsome young gentleman whom she promptly whisked off for snogs in a dark corner.  They now have a "date" (ahem!) on Wednesday...  Turns out he's in a lol!band.  I fell totally in love with a guy who looked exactly like Nikki Sixx, so I gave him my phone number.  I seriously hope that he calls; it would just been too cruel of God to put such an exact copy of Nikki Sixx in my path and then for him not to call!  After he had gone, I got chatted up by a nice boy and kissed him until hedonisticatedbooted me in the ass and told me it was time to leave because it was 3:15am.  Got a cab home with a weird cab driver, made tea, obsessed over Nikki Sixx look-a-like, went to sleep.  Should definitely have more nights out like this.

I love rock and roll!

Hey guys

I was wondering if any of you were up for going to the fabulous 80's rock night  Sniff the Glove on Friday.  It's at the Islington Bar Academy (Angel Tube) and is £5 to get in.  It runs from 10:30-3:30am.  I can get myself & someone else in for £2, so first come first served for that! 

Normally I would invite people round to the flat for pizza, hairspray & lols, but have to go to the opera with Mr. Misery-Guts beforehand, so I'll be coming straight from the theatre.  I'd be up for meeting people at about 11pm at Angel tube if anyone would like to do that?

  • Current Music
    I Love Rock And Roll